June 03, 2016

My Every Man!

I occasionally get trapped into a thought, whom of my men should I consider an ex?

Typically an ex is someone you have had a relationship with. Which makes the next logical question what defines a relationship?

Is it going steady with someone? Is it exploring potential with someone? Is it agreeing on future plans with someone? Is it dedicating time/ feelings to someone?

How do you define a relationship? Does the definition need to be mutual or you can call something a relationship while the other party calls it a fling?

Are flings a form of relationships?

Anyway, I don't know about you but I don't count "flings" as relationships. I won't call a guy I dated few times an ex too. I will only call those men I took seriously exs. A relationship is where I dedicated my time and my feelings to explore future potential with a certain man.

How many of these did I have?

A lot! You need the fingers in both your hands to count them.

What do they all have in common?

Other than innovatively breaking my heart?! Well, I think they all came into my life for the experience. Something about getting into my life and attempting different ways to break me seems to be irresistible. They all intentionally came into my life with no intention but breaking my heart.

It is so clear now, and what is really painful is that sometimes I saw the mess happening yet took the leap of faith anyway. What is really painful is that I took them seriously in the time I shouldn't have done that.

They were all in for the game. I wonder when will this game be over.

I am drained!

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