December 13, 2014

The Eighth Year

Dear world, we have been a long way!

Eight years ago I posted my very first post on this blog. In my seventh blog anniversary, and as I was celebrating by spamming my social media timelines with re-posts of my old favorite posts. My mentor sent me a message commenting on one of my posts saying that he would like me to write for his newborn project.
The mentor was Abdullah Kamal and the newborn project was DotMsr. Few months later, he suggested that I should write about relationships.

Honestly, I was hesitated. Whatever I have been writing about relationships has been a reflection of completely personal experiences. I have been writing to heal my broken heart.
But he, my mentor, was very supportive. He told me not to worry about my “self centered” writing style. He said, that’s exactly what we want.

It happened! I got my first article published on dotmsr in last May. And a month later, I published my very first article about sex. The reactions to this article made me doubt the whole thing of the “writing dream”.
Some people called me sexually obsessed. Others went on congratulating me on being “bold and brave”. But what got to me the most was the sincere advice that I shouldn’t be focusing on relationships. Those who advised against this direction of writing said I had more potential, and made relationships look so trivial for a deep girl to tackle.

I took my worries and went back to my mentor, crying. I asked him how I would know if the advice was sincere or not. And for the last time, he guided my through fog ,as he died a couple of days after this conversation.

It had been an overwhelming year!

The thing that I never expected when I first started writing about relationships is that being “self centered” yet having to write to a diversified audience would help me figure out lots of things about myself.

I don’t write about myself for dotmsr, I did it once or twice. I actually write about relationships' topics after I research them and match what I have found to what I have experienced.

I have had some “eureka” moments. I have learned about myself and about others. It has been stressing and not in the least therapeutic yet I believe that it is totally worth it.

In my eighth year, I still dare not call myself a writer. But I can happily declare that I have been enjoying a fairytale. I am writing, I am self discovering and I am being read.

I wish my mentor was here. I miss him every step of the way.

Dear world, thank you for reading!