July 19, 2017

Jealousy

I used to get jealous. I used to feel the heaviness of competition. Then I met him. And I realized that I shouldn't feel threatened by other women. There will always be other women but their presence isn't a threat to me.
I am ok the way I am, I am loved for who I am.
I realized that it is men who compete to get to me and I shouldn't ever worry or feel threatened.

The things is he left, but that didn't change a thing. I am loved for who I am. I am not in competition with someone else.

There will always be other women. But none of them will ever be me.

July 18, 2017

3 A.M. Thoughts

Sometimes I wonder whether he ruined me beyond fixing or fixed me beyond ruining.

July 14, 2017

Anger

He said that I needed a fight so he gave me what I needed. I denied that I was looking for a fight yet kept fighting.
He listened, he doesn't usually listen.
He listened because I was angry and he wanted to know why I was so angry.
I am angry because he stalled when I was ready and because I stalled when he was ready.
I am angry because others did the things he was supposed to do. I am angry because he had known these things since forever and he chose not to do them.
I am angry because i know he did the right thing. Yet i can't help being angry every time someone else does smth i wanted him to do.

I am angry .. and i can't stop fighting.