What's Your Love Style?

Are you Giving or Taking?
You are Giving. You are a generous, unselfish person. This does not refer specifically to money, but also to less tangible things like your time, your help and your emotional support. You'll be best-matched with someone who's opposite to you in this respect, so look for someone who's a Taker if you want to make your life complete. You're best matched with a Taker.

Are you Committed or Free?
You are Free. As a 'free' lover, you tend to prefer relationships that are open and unfettered. This can keep it fresh and exciting but there is always a danger that the bird might fly off one day and not come back. Given your preferences, you'll probably find yourself happiest with somebody who's like you in this respect - so try to settle down with someone else who's a free spirit. You're best matched with another Free person.

Are you a Boss or a Slave?
You are Boss. Your result indicates that you prefer to be the dominant partner in your relationship. The boss role in sex is often a reflection of this position in general life, but there are always exceptions. Some people who are tyrants in the office come home and submit totally to their partners. As a boss, you'll be happiest in a relationship with someone who is your opposite. Every boss needs a slave. You're best matched with a Slave.

Are you Quiet or Exciting?
You are Quiet. In general you tend to be a quieter, retiring, introvert personality and you'll do best with someone else who is similarly inclined. You could therefore share subdued interests such as reading or golf. You're best matched with another Quiet person.

Too much for one night!

A bomb in lebanon. An air strike on Gazza ... Too much death for one night
I have a prayer to say; I pray for my country, I pray for the places I call home in the large yellow space between the two blue brackets, the atlantic ocean and the arabic gulf ...
I pray for all the dead ... I pray for all who died for the cause ... For all who believed and scarificed for the dream ... I pray for peace ... I pray for victory ... and I pray for unity ... I pray for truth ...

May God bless their souls and save us from the blood showers

Love!!

It is in what we expect, not in what we really find. It is in the pain not in the joy. Love resides else where but we are prisoners of our own illusions. We choose to fall for the imitations and miss the precious stone.Love is mutual, love is real and love sustains. Love isn’t a way to escape our realities. Love exists, it shows when least expectedLove is a treasure protected by a spell, “those who hunt love shall not find it”, “those who hunt love shall always be in pain”, “those who hunt love shall be cursed for eternity”.We all hunt love, or at least most of us did at least once in life time. The teenager who struggles with hormones hunted love thinking it is the savior. The lonely girl hunted love dreaming of a prince charming saving her. The young boy hunted love to grow into a man. Love was the answer and still it is. It is the answer we sought to explain hormonal rush, severe depressions, loneliness, neediness, emptiness and more unanswered feelings. Instead of answering those feelings we just thought it is love, we used the most appealing answer deceiving no one but ourselves.Sorry, but if love is the answer, the question should be re-phrased.

11 mintues

I am currently reading 11 minutes by Paulo Coelho, it is a story about Maria who happened to be a prostitute. I couldn’t understand why my friend gave it to me, the deeper get into the book the more I understand why he wanted me to read it. It is a story about life not prostitution. It is about men and women not sex.
I am quoting here;

“They didn’t mind spending three hundred and fifty Swiss francs to stop being themselves for a night.For a night? Now come on, Maria, you are exaggerating. It’s really only forty-five minutes, and if you allow time for taking off clothes, making some phony gesture of affection, having a bit banal conversation and getting dressed again, the amount of time spent actually having sex is about eleven minutes.Eleven minutes. The world revolved around something that only took eleven minutes”.

“The most important piece of advice, however, came from a Filipino woman called Nyah: when your client comes, you must always groan as if you were having an orgasm too. That guarantees customer loyalty.But why? They are just paying for their own satisfaction.No, that’s where you are wrong. A man doesn’t prove he’s a man by getting an erection. He’s only a real man if he can pleasure a woman. And if he can pleasure a prostitute, he’ll think he’s the best lover on the block.”

Oh Dear God, my theories are not only on my head. Thank you God, I am not alone and I am not always wrong!!

Online Relations - Part 2

The internet could be like any place for meeting other people, just like the bar, the club, weddings and so forth...The only difference is that you could hide your identity and looks to be who you always wanted to be, but never had the guts!! The truth is discovering the identity of a cyber character is so much related to luck, then comes time, personal differences and a high degree of transparency and honesty. With all the previous factors available the cyber character will be a reflection of the real character, the internet then will play the role of a mirror. But in most cases the internet is a lens that changes the output character. Part of our hidden self gets out under the spell of anonymity. The idea that no one knows us in real might be tempting to many people to do what they shame to do in public.
For instance, browsing a sex shop online will be more convenient for most of us than getting into a sex shop in real (this apply for those who live in a place with sex shops!!). Talking about taboo topics, openness to meet knew people and even socializing online is easier to a great extent than doing it in the face to face world.
Using the internet as a fun tool, in the way Omar and Nadeen implied is the extreme case described by the cartoon posted by Ossama.
Faking characters to manipulate people’s thoughts and feelings in order to have fun such a behavior can be least described as childish behavior.
And I guess the real problems that arise because of internet arise in that section, where girls get online to have fun and boys to get the freebies.
The question Nadeen posed about meeting someone online and getting attracted to him/ her in the middle of the fun process is really serious as the thing is even meeting someone online while not playing and having fun never means that there is a way you can know him/ her is the one. Given the other person is honest and is open but yet when we like we only like the text format of that person. Things can never be serious unless this text format is upgraded to a fully executable format. The same process Hanney described in his story of meeting his wife, chatting on daily basis for a certain time till both of them felt that they need to leave the virtual world to the real world. Then dating and walking the steps of a healthy relation. The unhealthy relation is calling a “.txt” like the mighty name of love. In Hanney’s story the internet was a mirror and a medium to meet just like anywhere else, in the case Nadeen describing the internet in a lens that enlarge or minimize the original object. Or even it is an artist who draws someone who doesn’t exist.

Shadow Hunt!!

What’s love? Is it forgiveness? Is it forget-ness? Or is it the second chances we grant? Are we in love when everyday is a new day? Does love have symptoms? Am I symptomatic of love?
He said that he have been thinking about how do I see him in my life. He said that he has concluded that I am in love with someone(s). Hence he decided he doesn’t care about how I perceive him into my life.

I am symptomatic of anger, I am symptomatic of sorrow, I am symptomatic of vengeance, and I am symptomatic of guilt. I can’t find any symptom of love. I can’t remember how love was, or when it was. I only remember he was right when he said I never let go. But he was wrong when he said I am attracted to things in them, I am only attracted to my trace they have. They were the last to see me alive, the last to see me happy, the last to see me in one piece. I am attracted to the untraceable trace of me. I am attracted to my blood on their hands.
I didn’t give him a good reply, I gave him the fog idea I have about him in my life, I told him I am still worried of the way he came in to kick everyone else out, not because I am that shallow but because he awakened something inside me, probably The Queen!!

Now playing, “Je t’aime” by Lara Fabian

Je t’aime, je t’aime
Comme un fou comme un soldat
Comme une star de cinéma
Je t’aime, je t’aime
Comme un loup comme un roi
Comme un homme que je ne suis pas
Tu vois, je t’aime comme ça

Tu vois, je t’aime comme ça

Online Relations - Part 1

When I was first introduced to the world of internet 9 years ago I memorized the internet code of anonymity. Never give away your real name, never give away your address, never give away your phone and always remember the internet isn’t safe.I remember one of the most famous tricks at that time, a flashing ad “Do you think the internet is safe, click here if you do”. At that time I never believed the internet is safe. I kept playing by the rules, I remember me, my sister and my cousins spending long nights on the MIRC, and keeping notes of the lies we tell. We started anonymous and we stayed anonymous. I quitted the IRC as I felt it was just for the teenagers, and I moved to the ICQ. And with that new move I started loosening the tight rules of anonymity, though “shimaagamal” didn’t show at that time, but I used my very well known nickname “misho” and started giving away my name, age and location to people who comes by. I kept sticking to other rules, like no detailed personal information and sure no pictures. The more I stayed online the more I loosened the rules, I started feeling home online, and my life started to move from the real world to the virtual world. Through these 9 years of internet I have come across tens of people, but not all of them qualify to be an online friend. And those I call online friends are those friends I have only in the cyber space. They live in my virtual world, we talk we share and we confide in one another within the web borders. They are real in the virtual world and they are virtual in the real world.Anonymity is of the great things about the internet, you can be whoever you want whenever you want and as it shows anonymity isn’t only the greatest thing about internet it is also the worst thing about it. In the virtual world you trust what you read not what really exist.Again, personally speaking I have few online friends, friendships that started 8 years ago, but out of the tens I met online, only 2 or 3 persons sustained the virtual friendship thing, another 2 crossed the virtual sphere border and became real friends and the rest were lost in the cyber space. Knowing someone in person is tricky enough so I guess knowing someone online requires a great degree of transparency in dealing with each other, and such transparency isn’t always the case of online relations.I thought of sharing part of my personal experience of online relations as a starter. There are many points to be covered, online friendship, online love, online dating and online marriage.

Nonsense!!

Can't find anything to write, My thoughts are hunting me, buzzing in my head. I can't sleep, I can't stop thinking of him, of them and of me. I just can't keep the past behind, I can't enjoy my moment and I can't look forward for tomorrow to come. I am trapped within myself, I am screaming but there is no one to listen and I am silent while everyone is loud.I am lonely but only when people are around!!