Jobless Lady*

One of my best friends wrote me this :)

By Amany Zakaria

================

I met a friend, not long time ago
A very close friend, with a mind that glows
She's single, well-educated I know
But was suprised to learn, she works no more!!!

Upon asking her the reason for so
Is it recession or no place to go
She surprised me with a theory...
I'd love to share with you all

She asked simplily "why the OH!
If I am not bored,
Nor am I financially low
In fact, there's a lot to do"

"I spend my time reading, like i never read before
I can develop mentally, that's for sure
I have time for my family and friends so close
Why is it a must i go to work?"

"Why link education to having to work?
Why staying home is such a dark thought?
Why, when I get married, it's better to stay home?
Why do I "just have to go with the flow?""

My family talks to me no more
My friends pray I leave the "store"
They believe i do nothing but clean the floor
Why not accept me the way I adore?"

Dear friend, forgive me for doing so
Not accepting nor supporting you
But, rather, pushing and arguing you
And why..........just because "everybody sees so"


*Special dedication to shimaa gamal. I'm still waiting for your theory in colliqual arabic, as i heard it from you :)

Blessings

Here is a secret; I keep a list of almost everything that could be listed. I keep lists of things that made me happy, things that would me happier, things I hate and things I love. I keep a list of people and their priorities. I subconsciously list everything. And sure I have had listed the blessings I could count before.

But upon Ibhog’s request, here I am sharing some of the blessings I could count because regardless how hard any of us could try, we can never count the blessings God granted us.

Here are the rules:

· The point is to say a heartfelt ‘Thank God’. So, you’ll have to choose power blessings, ones that really really are endowments, that you couldn’t possibly feel deeper gratitude towards God for. Ones that you feel grateful for, everyday.

· After each blessing, you’ll have to choose one word to describe your state. Examples: “Happy”, “Excited”, “Thankful”, “Humble”. Or, you have to choose any word that comes to your mind after it anyway – one that’ll summarize it all.

· The ones you’d choose are preferred to be special to you, for instance, we all know that ‘Eye Sight’ is an immense blessing, and of course we can list it, but preferably if it has a special meaning to us.

· The number of your blessings should be between 5 and 10.

· After finishing your list, you should write the word: “El7amodellah” in bold, and say it out loud.

· You should tag as many friends as you can – even the ones who don’t blog, inform them that they must comment.

· After that, well, all you do is to be happy and to have ‘Reda’

و إن تعدوا نعمة الله لا تحصوها

And here is my list:

1- I am grateful for having my father, sister and brother. They are the air I breathe. The reason that makes me wake up every morning even when I am so angry at them.

2- I am grateful for having friends. People who care about me even when I disappear for months. They never lose hope in digging me up. I am grateful they are always there.

3- I am grateful for having a large family. I have a total of 12 uncles and aunts both sides. With an average of 3 kids for each. You do the math. I have a little tribe that I call family. I am so grateful to have them and I am so grateful we are so close to each other.

4- I am grateful that people don’t hate me at first sight. Some might think I am arrogant but most of the time people like me.

5- I am grateful I can afford many things others can’t.

6- I am grateful I have nothing but minor problems. I could have said no problems but minor is my excuse to whine later.

7- I am grateful for being healthy and young.

8- I am grateful for having a religion. It would have been too hard for someone with my mind o find God if I was born not believing in one. I am grateful for being a Muslim.

9- I am grateful for being saved from all the troubles I had in my short life. God always saved me.

10- I am grateful for being able to remember these blessings in the dark moments. I am grateful that God is merciful to let his blessings lit my occasional darkness.

اللهم لك الشكر

So, now write your own list. You are tagged.

You can find Arabic translation here. Special thanks to L.G.

Marwa Rakha Against Publishers

Spread the word!

http://marwarakha.blogspot.com/2009/09/blog-post_04.html

Ironically 30

Sometimes I feel that you, my dear dedicated blog readers and passersby, are really lucky. Because most of the time God, for those of you who believe there is one, spare you a lot of none sense. I know it has been a while since I last wrote anything. It has been too long that I even forgot how I used to do it. But here I go again trying to be as courageous as before to spill the nonsense I have in my mind into a readable form.

So, I am thirty. Yeah, finally I crossed that virtual line I drew for myself 10 years ago. I was planning to get back to blogging by a long post about those thirty years of my life. I was planning to give a long speech about how failure is success in the core. I was planning different forms of celebrations that weren’t limited to that long philosophical speech that God just spared you. (For those who don’t believe in God this is enough reason to believe! Trust me!)

I was planning different outings with different people; I also planned a hair cut and a photo session. I was hoping to buy a new scanner to share with my “facebook world” the evidence that a cute little kid could actually grow to be …. Well, me!

As I have always done in the last 30 years I had the best laid plans and I had the will to see them through. Though the hair cut thing was delayed, and so did the metamorphosis photo album. But I had my share of fun and sure presents!

As I wanted, the celebrations started a week ahead. A thing that I believe a typical narcissist would do. My cousin threw me my 1^st online party, my sister started the count down and dug all types of birthday songs she could find online. I started a series of outings with most of my favorite friends. I talked, they listened and the food was great.

To sum it up things seemed to be working perfectly according to plan, till it was – 3 or 4 hours to cross the line and the phone rang.

I wasn’t really expecting the voice on the other end but I kind of expected the call. It was my uncle’s wife telling me that my grandpa just passed away.

At this point I could start lecturing about life and death. I could take this as a reason to give the lecture I have been planning to prove how wise I am at the age of 30.

But I just can’t. Because two minutes after that phone call and as I was fighting tears and reciting prayers for my late grandpa I got a text message on my phone wishing me a happy birthday.

Well, it isn’t really my very 1^st time to lose a grandparent just before my birthday; my grandma did it two days before my sweet 16. I don’t want to sound paranoid but doesn’t it feel like a conspiracy!

I just can’t stop laughing. How people are reacting to the awkwardness of the situation. I am having“three in one” phone calls, condolences + birthday wishes + Ramadan greetings.

I can’t ignore the irony. I am in no position to preach how a person should act in a similar social situation. I actually replied to those birthday wishes by “thanks, my grandpa passed away”. I know it was rude but I couldn’t find a better way. I really appreciated those who were socially smart and wished me a better year. I don’t mean that this year was a bad one, but what else could a one say in a birthday and a funeral!

Anyway, I thought that my 30th birthday was a really good joke and I shouldn’t be laughing at it alone.

And for you kids who aren’t 30 yet, don’t over plan! Because there will always be a factor that you can’t control. Whatever they teach you about planning in a pure myth. Planning is just organized dreaming because destiny will always be there. And always, always be ahead of things. Celebrate as early as you remember and apologize as soon as you do the mistake. Life is too short to wait for the right time.

And for those oldies above thirty, if you are still planning thinking you could beat destiny so you are hopeless. And if you are still waiting for the right time, congratulations you have wasted your life!

“Happy birthday, I am sorry for your loss and Ramadan Karim!”

Picture from: Gill's Blog

That Train!

A month ago I went to Assuit to attend my cousin’s wedding. Assuit is a beautiful city in Upper Egypt; it takes almost a 6 hours train trip to get there. The wedding was nice, I didn’t stay long enough to enjoy the city but what I have seen was enough to make me want to get back sometime.

And as all the good things in life, the nice trip to Assuit has to come to an end. When we arrived to the train station we found our train moving. It wasn’t supposed to depart until another 30 minutes, but people started saying that there was an unannounced change in the train schedule. And that was when my uncle, my dad and my brother started running to get aboard the moving train.

My brother jumped into the train, my uncle followed and my decision was “I am not going to jump in”. The train was accelerating; I didn’t find the circumstances suitable. But here came the father who started yelling at me to jump aboard. He actually kept running holding the train as if he would magically stop it while yelling at me to jump.
The image of my father ran over by the train was the only thing that made me take that step. He wasn’t going to jump in without me and he wanted to get into that train by any means. So, I jumped aboard an accelerating train. I took an unnecessary risk because my father wanted me to do.

I did the thing he believed is right, though I still believe that it is wrong. I did the thing he thought is for my benefit just because I was too scared he would kill himself trying to put me on that train.

Ironically after we jumped aboard the train stopped. It was a sort of silly joke.

But the point is my father didn’t want me to miss the train, as if that train is my only ride to paradise. In the time there was going to be no harm to leave me behind. I had enough money, I had my cell-phone and I wasn’t in a strange city. My aunt lives there, actually 15 minutes away from the station and another uncle was staying the night there and was heading back to Cairo next morning. There was no harm leaving me behind and the destination of that train wasn’t paradise.

Yet my dad, yelled at me to jump aboard an accelerating train. He made me take a risk that I wouldn’t take just because he believed my benefit is to be on that train.

I don’t know why this train incident would sum up how “parents” in this part of the world affect their children’s lives. That train represents the opportunity. My decision to pass and my dad’s decision to jump in represent the conflict of interest between the best our parents want for us and the best we believe in. I believe that missing that train would have been an exciting experience. I would have seen new things. I would have had a mini-adventure. The risk wasn’t high and I am not a school girl who won’t know how to get back home. Actually the risk of falling off the moving train was higher than the risks borne to staying the night in a strange city.

My point is, missing an opportunity might be an opportunity. It is not the end of the world. And no one should know what’s best for you but yourself. No one has the right to corner anyone into doing anything because they believe it is the right thing to be done. There is nothing “right” in this world. And if there is anything that has to be right, it will always be the things your parents taught you while not influenced by adrenaline!

Later, he admitted it was wrong to push me to jump aboard that train. It just seems that he was the one who couldn’t take the risk of leaving me behind. But this is the point. He spent all his life preparing me for the moment he will leave me behind. He spent all his life teaching me the risks of trying to catch a departing train. He was the one who taught me to see the opportunity in missing the train. He brought me up on appreciating what I have in hand. But in a glance, he lost faith in me.

A thing that makes me wonder if that faith was ever there. Or if love would make us unintentionally hurt our loved ones.

Or do we intentionally hurt them to push them to do what we believe is right?!

A lesson in Flirting

Assume you are a bitter single. You have been in a long abusing relation that ended magically but you are still suffering from the consequences. Assume you are sitting alone in your regular place sipping your own misery with your drink. Assume that you were too traumatized to even look around for potential candidates. Then out of the blue someone came smiling.

What if this someone took the step and came to where you were silently sat for maybe years. What if this someone started saying the things you have wanted to hear? What if this someone started doing the unexpected “expected”. Praising what you know he would be praising, promising things without really promising and finally concluded the grand gesture with offering to buy you a drink.

Would you turn this offer down?

That was exactly what president Obama did in his speech addressing the Muslim world. He gave a lesson on how to flirt without selling yourself short.
The speech came with the Obama guarantee. It was as enjoyable as any of his speeches. It came as everyone secretly expected. Because no one wanted to place high hopes on an American president.

It was tricky advancing the highly diversified Muslim world. But the speech actually had something for everyone. It was promising yet disappointing. It promised everyone what he secretly wished for but without granting this wish.
It was a very well balanced speech that addressed the major areas of conflict. It was a very smart speech because it focused on the commonalities. It was very wise because it asserted that it is not a commitment it is just to show good will.

The speech is a grand gesture that means a lot regardless the vague promises. (Personally I don’t see them as vague. He just promised the things he can do but promised to try with the things he can try. He also stated it is a cooperation not a one sided relation)
It was a grand gesture choosing “Cairo”. It was really a smart choice. It is one of the oldest Islamic Capitals. It played one of the biggest roles in the Islamic history especially in critical times. Actually few Islamic Capitals could compete with Cairo in that field. Medina the prophet’s capital comes first in importance but unfortunately non-Muslims aren’t allowed in (though there is no religious reason to do). Next come Baghdad & Damascus. Both were the capitals of the great Islamic Empire. But because of the wisdom of Mr. W, Baghdad is temporarily out of service and addressing anything from Damascus isn’t an option. Istanbul would have made a perfect choice too but unfortunately Ataturk decided to take it out of competition. Plus Cairo has Al Azhar with everything that it represents.
Cairo was grand gesture not only for the historical value but also to imply the importance of Egypt in the region. Again, the US-Islam problem is mainly Arabic. And to tackle an Arabic problem there is no better place than Egypt.


So, why make history? Some said that the economical crisis has pushed him towards the Arab money. But in my humble believe if he was after the Arab money he would have given the speech in Riyadah, Kuwait, or even Doha. If he was after the money he would have gone to it. But he came to where there is no money. He came to where politics is made. Which will leave the question unanswered, why approaching the Muslim world?
Simply he is doing it for the same reasons Bush started his crusade.

Before the visit, Mohaly posted a video that I personally found offensive. In that video someone was warning the west from the Islamic danger. According to the video in few years the majority of the world will be Muslims. And this according to the video is catastrophic.

I found the video offensive because I live in a world with a majority of Christians yet I don’t feel compromised. I found the video offensive because I couldn’t see how terrorism means Islam in the time others excelled at it. The Muslim victims of Islamic terrorism are more than victims from other religions. Through history we will find that the number of non-Muslim terrorist out numbers the number of Muslim ones. So, why Islam is viewed a religion of terror?!


The answer is simple. A majority of Muslims means a change in how things are being done in the world. Not only because majority will elect people who will impose laws representing their interests. Because even if the majority didn’t change the law, the change in the personal choice of persons will change how a community function.
So, imagine Amsterdam, for example, in few years with no beer, no red street and no pot smoking in the streets! Some will think this will be a better Amsterdam and some are convinced that this is a loss of culture.

So, it is a cultural fight! It is what we may call the Islamic conservatism that scares the world. But is it really only culture?! Europe has gone through a massive cultural change to become the Europe we know now. They became the Europe they are now when they managed to lock God back in the Church. They locked the God the Catholic Church represented. They locked the limitations on innovations in the name of God. They locked the forces that tried to keep Europe in the dark along with God in the church.

So, the idea of getting God back out of the safe locked place should sound scary. And fighting change is instinct. And as Arabs and Muslims all over the world are fighting the change happening in their cultures, it is the west’s right to defend its cultural heritage. They have the right to defend the openness that will be compromised if Islamic conservatism was introduced. This very same conservatism worries many Muslims about the ability of the Islamic world to follow the world progress.

Through history there is only one lesson people keep forgetting. A war with a different cultural doesn’t preserve yours. In many cases wars were the way cultural change was introduced. So the previous American administration wasn’t really that wise putting the USA in war with Islam.

That war gave Islam an unintended exposure, the exposure that increased the risk of the cultural change the west dreaded.
So, if Islam is really inevitable. There should be a way to soften the change, hence the speech.


Now back to where we started, the nice someone making a grand gesture at us has his own issues too. We are sitting sipping our misery. And then we have this chance for a drink and a nice company. Nothing promised. Commitment is far beyond imagination. But there is potential if both parties worked hard enough. Would you smile back and accept the drink or would you just keep slowly sipping the bitterness of the past?!

Personally, I will go for the drink. As long as I am not selling myself short or putting high hopes. As long as I know that if a relation is to come it is a two parties’ work. I guess the drink will be perfect.


Mr. President, thanks for the lesson.

P.S.
For everyone who said that these are just words and we want action isn’t it a bit early for action? and even if these were just words at least he showed respect and this is rare. I know Egyptians who won’t even say they are pleased to be in Cairo. The guy said he was honored. He could have used many other words to describe happiness but he was honored to be in the city disrespected by its own inhabitants.
The guy showed understanding for Islam that some Muslims don’t show. He didn’t only address the Muslims he actually addressed people around the world. People around the world know now that Islam has another side. People around the world now know that Muslims has the right to practice their religion and Islamic prayer isn’t a ritual done before bombing a plane.
Which part of this speech can’t eradicate decades of conflict didn’t you get?!

Internet Rule #1 – A Reminder

It seems that some of us keep forgetting the internet rules of thumb. And no it is not the “don’t give your real contacts to anyone online”. It is the rule about never receiving a file that you don’t know its sender. And never receive an executable even from your best-est friends. It is the rule of never enter your email password on any site other than your email provider site.

It is the rule of staying safe and secure online.

You don’t give your password(s) to anyone and you don’t enter this password(s) anywhere. You don’t give anyone your credit card number (or your bank details if that matters)online and always use a secured and verified way to your online payments. And it is strongly recommended to dedicate only one card for the online purchases with a very low credit limit. (You are not buying diamonds online!)
And if anyone is wondering why I am posting such a reminder now, it is because I keep receiving emails that scream “someone has been owned” like this one

“Dear friend：
i would like to introduce a good company who trades mainly in electornic products.Now the company is under sales promotion,all the products are sold nearly at its cost.They provide the best service to customers,they provide you with original products of good quality,and what is more,the price is a surprising happiness to you!It is realy a good chance for shopping.just grasp the opportunity,Now or never!
The web address: (www.) bolocn.com”


How would anyone know that such emails are fake, ( forget about the spelling mistakes because most of us won’t even notice but if this is a real promotional ad, the company would have at least used a word processor and revised the spelling mistakes!)

First the subject is vague, “Dear Friend, A business Opportunity … etc”. None of your friends will use such a subject line. But assume that they might do. And assume that you like the content of the mail and you are so tempted to follow that link. Please, please, please. I beg you to ask google 1st about that site. It is simple and idiot proof, you copy the link and paste it to google and press search. You might be amazed by the results. In the previous example, the search result should have returned a company’s home page but it actually returned nothing but people screaming that their accounts have been stolen and that the owners of this site have emptied many bank accounts.


Please, stay safe. The internet is just like a street; will you ever give someone in the street your bank details?!

Here's to the Future

We spend our whole lives worrying about the future, planning for the future, trying to predict the future, as if figuring it out will cushion the blow. But the future is always changing. The future is the home of our deepest fears and wildest hopes. But one thing is certain when it finally reveals itself. The future is never the way we imagined it.

The list of Eights

I was tagged by gjoe and jessy. Actually it took me too long to think. But it is really fun to know that I don't have as many wishes and I am not looking forward as many things ;)

8 Things I’m looking forward to:
1. Visiting my sister/ My sister’s vacation
2. My family and friends coming back on vacation
3. Sheri’s Wedding
4. Having some “me time”
5. The day I start over
6. None
7. None
8. None

8 Things I did yesterday:
1. Woke up
2. Texted Sameh (repeated all day)
3. Emailed sister (repeated all day)
4. Checked email/ FB/ google reader
5. Phone calls
6. House chores (cooking, laundry and unpacked)
7. Read a book.
8. Visited my Grandpa and Grandma

8 Things I Wish I could do: (ranked by the degree of feasibleness)
1. Drive
2. Have my own business
3. Travel the world
4. Meet S (yeah, you! I think it is that impossible! *broken heart*)
5. Cut off HH, peacefully!
6. Read minds
7. None
8. None


8 Shows I Watch
1. Grey’s Anatomy (This show deserves a whole post)
2. Fatafeat
3. None
4. None
5. None
6. None
7. None
8. None

8 Things I Love:
1. The smell of rain
2. Long walks
3. Warm talks
4. Good food
5. Reading
6. Silence
7. Cooking
8. None

I tag Haz, Om Hagar, ibhog, kochia and Inso

A Short Break

I am going back to the sacred valley, a journey that I am really longing to.

And till I see you again enjoy this song