January 13, 2009

Farce!!

I couldn’t help but sharing what I thought is a very funny joke.
These are the qualifications needed for a candidate to fill a secretary position


Job Description:


1. Attends meetings with the company president, including night meetings (Sometimes) & Sometimes will be outside Cairo. Takes and transcribes notes, prepares draft of notes on word, Types letters, memoranda, reports, etc., from dictated, handwritten, or other sources.


2. Organizes and maintains files and records, answers telephone related to the company president, Operates word processing equipment.


3. Performs other related duties as required and assigned.


4. Will be responsible about his daily schedule and reminding him everyday.


5. Managing all the office work related to Company President.


6. Working hours from 10:00 – 6:00 & Thursday from 10:00 am – 3:00 pm & (2) days OFF (Friday & Saturday) BUT sometimes working hours will be flexible depending on the work and depending on the schedule of the President.


7. The design of the Forms & Reports that she will be using.


8. Arranging his Desk.


9. Attending with him different Parties and Receptions related to work.


Qualifications:


1. Recognized office administration qualifications.


2. Good English.


3. Excellent Computer & Internet Skills.


4. Very well organized person.


5. Looking for Non-Routine & Non – Boring Job.


6. Very Caring about her Boss.


7. Very Very Outgoing Personality.


8. Have Experience in organizing and managing office of her boss.


9. Very Smart.


10. Can work under stress.


11. Can work for long hours.


12. Loves Traveling.


13. Loves Fashion & Very Selective in the style of her cloth.


14. Very High Self Confidence.


15. Very Loyal to her Boss.


16. Very Active & Very Dynamic.


17. Excellent Communication & Interpersonal Skills.



Am I just being paranoid or this ad is about having a girl friend not a secretary. C’mon, parties, loves fashion, caring, confident and loyal!
Can this be only business?!

27 comments:

jessyz said...

Heheh is this a real ad?
What if a man had all of these qualifications could he apply?

Shimaa Gamal said...

Unfortunately it is real :)

http://www.egyrec.com/getdetailjob.asp?j1=kmcreation&j2=49783

It seems it is an advertising agency or something. I got the details by mail and I applied just because I really love saying the "but you know I am vieled" phrase :)

I really can't imagine how can my taste of fashion and CARING be a job qualifiction!
I can't stop laughing!

jessyz said...

Well at least they didn't add "has nice legs and big boobs"

Shimaa Gamal said...

Well, that's why they invented interviews :))
You know, to make sure the candidate is qualified ;)

You know, I went to an interview where the "potential boss" asked me about my shoe-size while definitly not looking at my shoes!

Yeah, I was asked about my shoe-size and my zodiac sign. Ah and my love life!
And guess what, the job ad didn't have any of the things mentioned in this ad. I really wonder how it will be like to be interviewed for this job!

jessyz said...

Wow! I've only been asked about pregnancy and I think that's a fair enough question when they have a project which has a deadline. All of those questions are definitely inappropriate. Then again maybe company perks included free shoes :D.

Shimaa Gamal said...

LOL @ free shoes

This way, I guess I owe the guy an apology for doubting his questions :)) zalmtoh LOL

Marwa Rakha said...

LOL ... I wonder if he wanted a girl friend what would he have asked for?:)

Reminds me of Jala Fahmy in the Egyptian version of pretty woman :S

gjoe said...

LOOOL!!


7'atty balek enty men very very outgoing deh..

mesh 3arfa leeh 7aseet bel "arfa" ba3d el e3lan dah :D

LiL^OrioN said...

LOL!!! oh my.. reminds me of some chinese ads. did you know some of the chinese believe so much in zodiac signs to see if you're really suitable for the job? so even if you had brains and satisfy all other qualificatons, but your zodiac says otherwise, you're out. gosh!..

Shimaa Gamal said...

Hello Marwa
Thank you for passing by.

I bet he can’t find a better girl friend. This guy is so smart. He will have every man’s dream and won’t have to give any commitment back. Unless, salary is considered commitment these days!
Hilarious!

Shimaa Gamal said...

Ya gjoe ya 7ayaty mahy lazem tekoon very very very outgoing. Omal ya3ny testa7mel ezzay the not boring job.
Bezemtek, can anyone promise anyone a not boring job? Even someone working in a circus will get bored.

el 7aga elly begad tegeeb el 2arfa, is the fact en el akh dah is applying the same philosophy en el banat 3ala 2afa meen yesheel. He is sure that there will be someone who will happily accept. And even some girls will brag about it as a career!

Shimaa Gamal said...

Hello Rufi
Seriously! Are they that ignorant? I thought the Chinese were kidding about starting the Olympics in the all 8’s date and time. But it seems I was wrong! They really believed in lucky dates/ years!
Zodiacs in the 21st century! This is farce too!

Frustrated said...

No, no, no....I can't believe them!! did they really write this?? or have they just thought about it & of course they changed their minds about publishing?? remember "al de7'ool bel malabes al rasmeia?", the guy version of this ad "taba7' 3oionoh was3a":)

Noly said...

Shi ya Shi, C.V eh yabnty ely enty b3ateha wenty fakra el C.V forms bta3etna dy tenfa3 ly ad shek zay dah! bosy yabnty el C.V el sa7 ba2a ely tele2 ly haga zay dy:

NAME: Soso Kamanga

Objective: to work as a girlfriend in any reputable night club ( yofadal girlfriend ly sa7b el makan el mo7taram dah).

Qualifications: haifa2, shakra2, mamshokat el kawam, tokades el hayt el zawgeya w toshark fel asas aw 7asab el relationship ba2a law so7obya momken teshark bel ma2kolat wel mashrobat :D

preferred working hours: 1 A.M to 5 A.M 3shan yadob Soso tel7a2 ba2a terga3 el bat tesaly el fagr 7ader!

w lesa!

insomniac said...

i would love to apply for that job!! man, i would get a huge kick out of that interview!!

we kaman ya shimz enty zalma! howa ma2alsh lazem tekoon single (wala he doesn't mind as long as she has a very wide open *mind*"!!!

and did he assume that just because she'd have a good sense of fashion enaha hateb2a mamshooqet al qawam wa mozza!!!

kaman el ragel ma2alsh lazem mesh mo7agaba, he would have mentioned his preference of hair color to hint it ya3ne!!!!

i'll pass u my cv to send it :) and if they ever call for an interview, ur so coming with me!!

bel nesba le soso, she's a smart gal, men 1 am le 5 am is perfect, mafeesh prayers fel wa2t da fa mesh hatet3atal 3an 3ebadet rabena!!

ya gama3an ento mesh open minded leeh!

Sherif said...

The same impression I have
Some people need love as you said

I think there are so many ways other than hiring a secretary ..what do you reckon?

Shimaa Gamal said...

Hello Frustrated

Hehee, wel secretary teshta3’al fi el maktab elly fo2, zay ma abo bakr ezzat ka beyshta3’al fi el matbakh elly fo2
Actually, I can’t stop thinking that this guy mistaken posting the ad with a draft of one if his day dreams.

Thanks for passing by :)

Shimaa Gamal said...

Noly ya Noly
Mesh 3arfa ashkorek ezzay 3ala el c.v. form. Fe3lan di more professional :)
Bas I think I will go with the name sonya hashtaka, le2noh bey3kes tabe3et el 3amal, we yebanyen ad eh en sonya dedicated lel wazifa
And mawa3eed el 3amal momtaza, howa el wa7ed yehmoh eh 3’ier enoh yesaly el fagr 7ader?

Shimaa Gamal said...

I applied for that job ya Inso and they didn’t contact me yet :( I wish you a better luck. Just stick to the CV form Noly sent, and make sure to attach a suitable photo. Don’t commit my same mistake of sending a typical cv for a not so typical job.
I believe that he implicitly meant the very wide open “mind” thing. that’s why I know ana mesh zalmah :) bas enty elly tool 3omrek tayba we mesh batkhady balek :p
We should start a contest to name this ad, I will go with “2oreed 7oban wa 7anannan”
Any suggestions?

Shimaa Gamal said...

Hello Sherif
I miss your comments
Actually, this guy went so far looking for care. he decided to hire a professional. The thing is, he could have got what he needed without posting it in an ad.
How can someone put loyal as a job qualification. Am I supposed to be loyal to someone who I don’t know, or is he hiring for a dog?
He could have simply placed a typical ad, looking for the best person to do the job which is supposed to be a secretary. He isn’t looking for experience if you noticed. The ad has no reference for the minimum experience required. The ad has no reference for the degree of education. He could have asked for the best candidate and then screened them in an interview. He should have looked 1st for the qualifications needed for the job then check if she is able to stay up late in business related parties. He could have asked for a cv with a recent picture to role out those who doesn’t represent his company’s image. But no he didn’t.
He should have posted this ad in a dating site where loves to travel is considered a qualification. Because when it comes to business it is not important if you love to travel or not, what really matters is if you can travel or not.
He sold himself short, and if he is really looking for love he won’t get it. because the best candidate will always be soso kamanga or sonya bashtaka. Wala eh?

Noly said...

Shi ya Shi :)

I will go with( ANA 3YZA ASA7EB YES3EDAK ESHEK ESHEK :D :D ).

Om HAGAR said...

Hahahahahah

Of course not pure business. It is obvious that the main ad is searching for a girlfriend

batates_777 said...

You must be kiddin !! is this true !! OMG !!
....................

after realizing that It can be for real , may you send me his email :D:))) I think i am very very outgoing :D:D
and I am willing to attend parties and whatever it takes :D:D
oh god !!
you got teh heck out of me :D:D
I need this job !!:D:D
I wonder if later on, the qualifications will include the *** size or whatsoever ba2a !

I only wonder how the Boss looks ?

Shimaa Gamal said...

Hello Om Hagar
Trust me reading the ad I thought I mistaken a dating for a recruitment site but unfortunately the title was reading secretary not girlfriend :)

Thanks for passing by

Shimaa Gamal said...

Hello Batates
I don't have his mail :( the only way to apply to this job is through the site and I really hate that they didn't call me. For a secretary position that requires no experience I am over qualified. They should have called me. I am so pissed off, now I can't feed my curiosity. And the interview would have made a perfect material for blogging.

I am really disappointed :(

I think that boss will be 40 or around it, you know that kind of bosses. Not too old to be old and not young either :) He is messy, that's why he needs someone to arrange his desk :) he has trust issues because he wanted his secretary to be loyal :) And he is having serious trouble finding escort to social occasions so he is hiring a professional.

What do you think his idea of a qualified size be? :)

Jerkulez said...

Ok i know it all means a woman, but they actually didn't say that........
they are not looking for a GF, more of an escort service, she is getting paid after all.

This ads says it all interview are no more needed, just for the look assessment.

Shimaa Gamal said...

Hesham :)
The ad stated that the job is for females only

Only an escort service! A girlfriend sounded more dignifying!