Day in/ Day out

The point is I don't want to do any of the things I am doing.

I didn't want to do any of the things I have done.

But I have to keep doing. I have to keep trying. I have to move on. Because moving on is what rational people do.

Yet I don't want to. I didn't want it to end.

I wanted days with him. I wanted years of us sharing a bed, a couch, a cup of coffee, a book, a bath and a full life.

I wanted to have heated sex and discussions.

I wanted lots of things ... for the very 1st time in my life I knew what i wanted exactly.

But I have to move on. I have to keep doing all the things I don't want to do. I have to stay busy. I have to keep trying.

This is what rational people do!